I had a decent food day. I packed a bunch of snacks- things I like and enjoy. Things I will eat. Not great choices, but not the worst (on a scale from salad to fried chicken). I had a busy day at work- meetings and tasks. I had to speak in front of leadership- people whose opinion I value. I did well, and felt pretty good about what was accomplished.
That tension though- the lead up to the meetings- makes me want to eat to relieve some of the anxiety. I had a session with the counselor right after work, but I was plotting a binge afterward as I drove there. I was deciding between fast food and gas station snacks.
I had told my husband I would text him when I feel a binge coming on (my idea) to help talk me down… but I couldn’t tell him. Binging is such a shame filled thing, I couldn’t bring myself to tell him. If he said the wrong thing, it’d cause tension between us. It’s not a fair position to put him in.
Then I thought of my Beach Body Coach. I was assigned to her when I purchased a workout pack something like 2 years ago- maybe longer. I don’t know if they are all like her, but she’s so awesome. She checks in with me from time to time- but is never pushy. Right before I went in to my appointment, I sent her a message, just asking for encouragement and help to avoid the binge.
Let me tell you… when I came out of my appointment, I had 4 messages, multiple paragraphs each from her. Guess what? I drove my butt home and got to enjoy the meal my husband made. If I had binged, I would have forced it down to keep up appearances.
We are trying to save money too, so I avoided wasting money to boot!!!
Then, after the kids went to bed, I decided to use the treadmill. I jogged for maybe 30 seconds and walked the rest. I lasted a whole 5 mins. I am choosing not to feel the shame of that, but to feel proud that I did something. Something IS better than nothing!
The decision to ask for help, led to avoiding a binge, which led to the decision to exercise, however briefly. Now I’m going to sleep without the bloated overstuffed feeling, and without the shame!
I am taking action. Every little moment and every little decision I make matters!!!